The Konoha Candy Shop
by Papa Palpatine
Summary: What if the Urahara shop existed in Konoha? That's it. Everything follows Naruto universe rules, and no Bleach characters except for the Urahara shop crew. Naturally Yoruichi is a ninja. No pairings as of yet.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Bleach. Both franchises are owned by people who are not me. I make no monetary profit from writing this fic, this is purely for fun.**

**A/N: A couple of notes about this story before I get started: This is a fan fiction, therefore I can and will exercise creative license where I choose. If a character or event does not go how you wish it, that may be entirely by design. THAT BEING SAID, it also may be a failure on my part. If you have any concerns about my characterization, writing style, or the direction of the story, feel free to leave a review or PM me. I promise I won't make fun of you. On that note, please do not insult me with reviews, or if you do, at least throw some specific complaints or criticism in there with the insults. I want input I can use, not just blind rage. Well then, let's get started.**

(Ichiraku Ramen, the night of the Academy Graduation Exam.)

Sometimes the best way to cope with a traumatic event, such as finding out that you have a great and powerful demon sealed in your stomach, is to do something you love. Now, Naruto loved ramen, but something about his shiny new Hitae-Ite just made the meal taste that much better. The grin Naruto wore through that meal was even wider than his normal one; despite the horrific revelations, he had been privy to not even an hour ago.

"Proud of yourself Naruto-kun?" Iruka asked. He grimaced a little at his back injury. It was not very deep, or even very dangerous. It just hurt. A lot. However, the Chunin had managed to dress the wound enough that he was comfortable treating Naruto to a meal before he checked in with the medics.

"Mmhm!" Naruto nodded vigorously, his troubles forgotten for the time being. He slurped down the broth of his seventh bowl of the delicious heavenly delight just as Old Man Teuchi brought him another bowl. Naruto was a little confused. He had not even asked for another bowl yet. He certainly wanted one though, so he was not too concerned about that. No, Naruto's confusion came from the fact that he could not tell what kind of ramen this new bowl was.

"Don't worry Naruto! Your nose does not deceive you! Since it's a special day," Teuchi gestured to the headband, "I made this special ramen!" he leaned in close and whispered conspiratorially, "It's my new recipe. You're the first customer who's seen it. Best of all, for you it's on the house." Teuchi laughed at Naruto's star struck face. "Well go on then! Dig in! I need to know what my favorite customer thinks!" he crossed his arms with a proud look on his face.

Naruto's face slowly moved from shock to an even wider grin, if that was even possible, "Thanks Old Man!"

Iruka, having finished his one bowl marveled at his young friend's exuberance. He was a little worried though; he had sent a message to the Hokage detailing the special circumstances of Naruto's graduation. He could only hope that the message was delivered before final team assignments.

(Hokage Tower.)

Hiruzen Sarutobi was nothing if not punctual. Despite his mishap with a certain troublemaking blonde, he had still managed to conduct the team assignment meeting with the Jonin sensei to be while still coordinating the search for Naruto. Sometimes Hiruzen truly loved the ability to create Shadow Clones; being in two places at once certainly made his job much more manageable. However, despite the Jonin being the reason for the meeting, his attention was not on them. Instead, he was reading a note that had been delivered to him by a Dog masked ANBU. He had even stopped petting the black cat on his desk, much to the cat's consternation.

"Excuse me Hokage-sama," Kurenai Yuhi broke the silence that had descended upon the meeting.

Hiruzen cleared his throat and turned his attention away from the memo and back to the Jonin assembled before him, "Yes Yuhi-san?" he said with a smile on his face.

"Well, um forgive my asking, but is that letter important to this meeting?" Kurenai had a rather annoyed frown on her face.

_Good to see she takes the job seriously,_ the Third Hokage thought to himself. Then he grinned, "As a matter of fact, it is. I have just received word that one Naruto Uzumaki has graduated from the academy due to certain unusual circumstances." He waited a moment to let the news sink in, and then held up his hand for silence. As the room quieted, he resumed speaking, "Despite your protests, this news comes directly from Iruka Umino, a man whose judgment I trust in this matter. I will hear no argument on this, is that clear?" He waited for the assembled Jonin to nod their assent before turning to the ANBU, "Inu, please inform my clone to stop the search, and inform Umino-san that I have received his message." Inu nodded before disappearing in a swirl of leaves. "Now then," the Hokage started petting the black cat on his desk, "let us continue with team assignment, Yuhi-san? Who would you like for team 8?"

"Perhaps I should take Sasuke Uchiha, Hinata Hyuuga, and Chouji Akimichi." kurenai said thoughtfully.

"Interesting choices, your reasoning?" The Third puffed on his pipe.

Kurenai took a deep breath, "I have already have experience teaching Hinata. Sasuke will need to learn to use his Sharingan, and if I am not mistaken that includes a mastery of genjutsu. I do not mean to offend, but I doubt anyone here is as capable of teaching genjutsu as me."

"Quite correct. And the Akimichi?" Hiruzen was impressed with her reasoning; clearly, she had put some thought into this.

"He would round out the team both in combat and in demeanor. With any luck, he could get the other two to open up a bit."

Hiruzen smiled "Good, team 8 will be Sasuke Uchiha, Hinata Hyuuga, and Chouji Akimichi. That is, unless there are any objections?"

Asuma took this opportunity to voice a concern shared by many of the people in the room, "But pops, I mean, Hokage-sama, what about the Ino-Shika-Cho trio?"

"Actually," Shikaku Nara spoke up from the back of the room, "I've spoken to Chouza and Inoichi, and we agree on this one. We'd prefer if our kids were not on the same team. They need to learn how to work with other teams first. We don't want them getting too used to having perfect synergy with their teammates. Might get 'em killed in the field."

Mollified, Asuma turned back to the Hokage, "In that case, I recommend Ino Yamanaka, Kiba Inuzuka, and Shino Aburame for team 10." Asuma saw the Hokage gesture to continue, "They would be primarily a reconnaissance and tracking team. Their skills are all suited to aspects of information gathering, and they can balance each other in combat, if not now then with a little training."

The Hokage nodded and continued asking each Jonin who would comprise their preferred team. There were very few conflicts, and the few were resolved quickly. Eventually, all the teams were assigned but one: Team 7. "Well there are only three graduates left, Shikamaru Nara, Tenten, and Naruto Uzumaki. Are there any objections to this team?" The assembled Jonin looked around the meeting in confusion as they realized that every single one of them had already been assigned a team. Kurenai opened her mouth to point out the mistake when someone appeared to the side of the Hokage's desk in a small whoosh of wind. The Jonin stared at him wide eyed and not a few of them open-mouthed, due to both his sudden arrival and his appearance. He was wearing geta sandals, a bucket shaped hat with vertical green and white stripes, a dark green matching set of pants and shirt, a VERY dark green haori with white diamonds along the bottom and with the symbol of Konoha stitched into the back. To top it off, he carried a plain wooden cane over his shoulder.

"My my," the man said with a smile that somehow managed to be carefree and knowing at the same time, "Am I late?"

"No Kisuke, you're right on time actually," Hiruzen chuckled at the faces of his assembled Jonin.

Asuma recovered quickly and asked incredulously, "He's the sensei for team 7?!"

Kisuke pulled out a paper fan and opened it in front of his mouth in mock surprise, "Me? Why no, I'm just the simple owner of a candy store!"

Not buying it for a moment, Kurenai's eyes narrowed, "Then why are you here?"

"Ahh! I'm just here to pick up my cat!"

"Speaking of which," Hiruzen interrupted before an argument could start; after all, it was late and everyone in he room was rather tired, "Yoruichi, will you take team 7?"

The cat stood up and stretched a bit, then spoke in a deep male voice, "Sure, why not?" The cat then walked to the edge of the desk, jumped onto Kisuke's shoulders, and turned back to Hiruzen, "Well then, I take the meeting is over?" Hiruzen nodded.

Kisuke snapped his fan closed, "Well then! Toodles!" He gave a small wave before he and the cat disappeared with the same whoosh he had arrived.

As most of the Jonin left the room, Kurenai watched spot where the shopkeeper had disappeared with a twitching eye. Asuma watched with her for a few seconds before he turned to his father, "Was that a talking cat?"

Hiruzen gave up; he could not keep the laughter in any more. Asuma looked a little annoyed at his father's mirth, while Kurenai looked downright scandalized. Hiruzen noticed their expressions, and in between chuckles managed to say, "Don't worry, everyone says that."

Asuma looked at Kurenai, shrugged, and started walking to the door. She hung her head in exasperation and followed Asuma out to the sound of their Hokage's hysterics.

(With Kisuke and Yoruichi.)

"Seriously Kisuke? _Your_ cat?"

"You aren't mad are you Yoruichi-san?"

The cat sighed, "I suppose not."

Kisuke clapped happily, "Oh good! I was afraid I would have to run!"

"You really think running would save you?"

"Nope!" Kisuke chirped happily, "But it would annoy you, and that's what matters."

(Naruto's apartment, the next morning.)

Naruto woke up bright and early the next morning. He quickly dressed himself, tied on his Hitae-Ite, and grabbed all the things he thought he would need. Shuriken, kunai, ration bars, etc. As he got ready, a piece of candy fell to the floor. He remembered the shop that he bought it from and said to himself, "I better go tell Urahara-san, he's way more awesome than the other shopkeepers Dattebayo!" Just as he was about to rush out the door, he noticed the time on his stove clock. 8:30. Naruto grinned. He only had to be at the academy by noon. He had at least 3 hours of free time! As blond-haired, orange clad ball of energy left his home, his mind was racing through the possibilities of what he could do with over three hours. As he ran through the streets towards the market district, he cackled madly. If he were to think about it he would realize that such behavior would not help the civilians stop believing that he was a demon, but he was far to preoccupied with dastardly plans for pranks to think about such boring topics as social consequences.

Of course, his plans fled his mind when he caught sight of the Urahara Shop. Naruto dashed over to the front door and barged in, "Hey Urahara-san! Guess wha-" his words died on his tongue as he saw the eccentric shopkeeper standing in front of the door with one hand on each head of his young assistants, Jinta and Ururu.

"Look kids! It's a Genin! Say hi to the Genin, kids!" Kisuke said in his trademark mocking tone.

Jinta crossed his arms, "He still looks stupid to me."

"Congratulations Naruto-san," Ururu said quietly.

"Now now you two, that's enough of that. Come! I have some new medicine for you to shelve!" The tall man in the apron picked up the two children by their shirts and started walking into the storage area of the shop with a resigned Ururu and a struggling and ornery Jinta. "Oh," he turned around, "Well done Naruto-kun."

"Thanks Tessai-san!" Naruto waved after the retail associate, and then shot a glare at Kisuke.

"Whaaat? I was just having a bit of fun."

"Yeah yeah, whatever. Anyway, I wanted to stop by before I get my Jonin sensei!" Naruto flashed a thumbs up at Kisuke, "I bet I'm gonna get someone super awesome! But I'll get stronger than them in no time!"

"Yeah yeah," Kisuke waved his closed fan dismissively, "Sure you will." He ignored Naruto's disgruntled look and asked, "So why did you want to drop by? I don't think I have anything new." He started digging behind the counter for… something.

"Well you guys were always way cooler than the other shopkeepers." Naruto looked at his feet sheepishly, "I like you guys, you're nice to me. Most people aren't."

Kisuke paused in his digging and poked his head over the counter. He gave Naruto an uncharacteristically serious look, then dived back under the counter and resumed his search. "AHA! Found it!"

"Found what?"

"This!" Kisuke popped up from behind the counter with a small scroll between his thumb and index finger. "This is a sealing scroll!"

Naruto was intrigued, "What's it seal?"

"Things!" Kisuke said excitedly, "Now this one is a graduation present of sorts, so I made special for you!"

"Really!? You did!?"

"Yes I did! I am just that amazing. Even better, it has a couple of goodies you don't get in the normal ones. First: this one is keyed to you. You're the only one that can open or close it. Second: it's much smaller that the regular ones, but it holds just as much!" Naruto's eyes were as wide as dinner plates. "Why you might even say," Kisuke continued, "That it's bigger on the inside."

"Urahara-san you are so COOL!" Naruto dashed forward to hug the shopkeeper, but found himself held back by a cane tip on his forehead.

"Calm down Naruto, let me show you how to use this little beauty."

(Naruto's apartment, 30 minutes later.)

Naruto wasted no time on his way home to play with the scroll some more. In fact, he took so much time sealing nearly everything he owned, that by the time he was done he realized that if he left immediately, he would just barely get to the academy on time, and definitely not with enough time to prank nay of the Jonin. Naruto was annoyed with himself for missing such an excellent opportunity. He berated himself for his carelessness on his way to the academy.

(The Academy, just before Noon.)

Even though Naruto walked into the classroom somewhat depressed, he perked right up upon seeing the astonished faces of his classmates. He walked to his usual seat, listing to the murmurs of "He graduated?" "But he's the dobe!" "How'd he do it?" and at least one muttering of "Troublesome."

He was just barely in his seat, and about to gloat, when Iruka walked into the room holding a clipboard. "Okay," Iruka began, "You are all now Shinobi of Konoha, and are expected to conduct yourselves as such!" While Iruka said more, that snippet was all Naruto heard before he started tuning out. He tuned back in as he heard the team assignments called out.

Looking over at his new teammates, Tenten and Shikamaru, he shot them a grin. Tenten waved back and smiled, Shikamaru did not even lift his head from the desk. The three watched patiently, or not so patiently in Naruto's case, as each Jonin instructor collected their teams, except for team 7.

Naruto was ready to tear his hair out, "Gah! The only way this could be worse is if Sasuke-teme were on this team."

Shikamaru just groaned, "Naruto, quit being so troublesome."

"Hey guys, look!" Tenten pointed at the chalkboard where there was a message written that had not been there before.

The message read: _Team 7, Find me on the roof. Signed, Shihoin-sensei. _

(The Academy roof, a short time later.)

The three newly minted Genin walked out onto the roof and looked for their erstwhile sensei. Naruto was quickly distracted by a certain black cat. He walked over to the cat and knelt in front of it.

"Hey Yoruichi-san, I missed you at the shop," Naruto started giving the cat a head rub.

Tenten glanced over, "Naruto, quit playing with the cat help us find our sensei." Then Tenten noticed something odd about the cat, "Wait a minute, why is that cat wearing a Hitae-Ite on its neck?"

At this news, Shikamaru decided that the cat was probably more interesting than his halfhearted searching.

"Because, Tenten," a deep male voice came from the cat, "I am a Jonin of Konoha." Naruto fell back from the cat in shock, Tenten yelped and jumped a foot into the air, and Shikamaru raised an eyebrow, "My name is Yoruichi Shihoin, your new sensei," the cat made a small bow, "Pleased to meet you."

Naruto just stared in shock that this cat he had known for years could TALK. Tenten stammered out, "A-a t-t-talking cat!?"

Shikamaru's hand collided with his forehead, "A cat for a sensei. How troublesome." He sighed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Bleach. People who are not me own both franchises. I make no monetary profit from writing this fic, this is purely for fun.**

**A/N: First off, all of you that reviewed followed, and/or favorited, thank you guys so much! I honestly wasn't expecting this kind of response so fast! You guys are awesome. Yes you. YOU. You're my favorite. Anyway, I'm going to briefly address some concerns that came up: ANBU Inu is Kakashi, he is not a Jonin sensei this time around; Don't think I've forgotten Sakura, I have plans for her; I also have plans for Tessai and Kisuke, they do have rather large roles in the story, rest assured that I won't leave them out to dry. In addition, I will try to respond to all the reviews that I can. All right, here's the other bit: I'm settling with a weekly update schedule for now. This will be pretty loose, but I will try to update somewhere between Friday mornings and Sunday nights. I do actually write faster than that, but I want to start building a buffer before I have more constraints on my time. When my life gets more complicated with school starting, I will have to slow down. But we will jump off that bridge when we get to it.**

(The Academy roof)

"A cat for a sensei. How troublesome"

Yoruichi chuckled at Shikamaru's sigh, "You know I'm not technically your sensei yet."

Naruto recovered from his shock enough to say, "But Yoruichi-sensei," He added the honorific almost reluctantly, as if it felt strange to say, "What do you mean? We graduated didn't we?"

"Graduated from the Academy, yes." The cat drew itself up into a stately sitting position as it started to lecture, "But, you have yet to pass MY test." Yoruichi started licking a front paw.

"But, that's not fair!" Tenten protested, "We already graduated! We're Genin now!"

Yoruichi glanced at Tenten, "Genin yes. My students? That remains to be seen." The cat held up a paw to stop Tenten's coming outburst, "If I find you lacking, it would be cruel and irresponsible to teach you. Every Jonin in this village has enemies that may attack, or we may be called upon to aid another team in the field. I could end up running into a situation blind simply because I am the closest ally. Moreover, if I have a Genin team with me, then they run in blind as well. If I find you lacking, then sending you back to the academy is a kindness. You'll live longer."

Tenten bit back her retort while she processed what Yoruichi had said. "So then, what's your test?"

"In time, Tenten. For now let's properly introduce ourselves. As you know, I am Yoruichi Shihoin, I like catnip and sunning myself, I dislike stupid hats, and my hopes and dreams are none of your business." The cat gestured to Tenten, "Since you like talking so much, you're next."

Tenten thought for a moment, "Well, my name is Tenten, I like metal and calligraphy, I dislike fan girls, and my dream is to become a great Kunoichi like Tsunade-sama of the Sannin!"

Despite his earlier shock, Naruto did not need a prompt, he just jumped up and started chattering, "I'm Naruto Uzumaki! I like ramen and weird foreign candy from Urahara-san's shop, I dislike people that call me a demon and the time it takes to make instant ramen, and my dream is to be the greatest Hokage ever!"

Shikamaru, on the other hand, did need a prompt. It took Yoruichi glaring at him and leaking a very small bit of killing intent to get him to speak up, "My name is Shikamaru Nara, I like watching clouds and playing shougi, I dislike waking up, and my dream is for everyone to let me sleep in."

The cat looked at Shikamaru thoughtfully and cocked its head to the right, "Well then, now that that's over with, you can take the rest of the day off. I'll be testing you tomorrow at 10:00 AM. Meet me at Training Ground 3. Don't be late." With a flick of the tail, Yoruichi disappeared.

"Troublesome," Shikamaru laced his fingers behind his head, "So, you guys wanna get lunch?"

(Ichiraku Ramen, 10 minutes later.)

The other two members of team 7 found themselves soon tasting, by far, the greatest ramen they had ever had the pleasure of eating.

"Naruto this stuff is amazing! How did you find this place?" Tenten exclaimed between mouthfuls of delicious noodles.

"See? I TOLD you Ichiraku's was awesome! Right Old Man?" Naruto wiped his mouth after his third bowl.

Teuchi chuckled, "If you say so Naruto-kun, if you say so."

Ayame took this moment to come out of the kitchen and chat with the Genin for a bit. She was happy to see Naruto with friends for a change.

Shikamaru just kept eating without even uttering a single 'Troublesome'. When Ayame left however, his eyes took on a more serious cast. "There's something that bothers me about our new sensei," he said.

"Yoruichi-san?" Naruto asked, "What do you mean?"

Tenten snorted in laughter, "Really Naruto? Did you already forget that our sensei is a cat? No wonder you got such low scores!" She saw Naruto's glare and quickly raised her hands in apology, "Hey, come on, don't give me that look. I was just teasing you."

"Troublesome."

Both of Shikamaru's teammates groaned, "There it is!" they said in unison.

Shikamaru ignored the jibe, "Jokes aside, our sensei didn't use a Body Flicker."

Tenten looked surprised, "But what else could that have been? Sensei disappeared like that!" she snapped her fingers for emphasis.

Naruto piped up, "Uhh, guys? What's a Body Flicker?"

Shikamaru threw a flat look at Naruto as Tenten explained, "Weren't you paying attention in class? The Body Flicker technique?" She saw Naruto's blank look, "You know, the teleporty thing that Jonin use?"

"Ohhh! That thing! Yeah Jiji-san does that all the time!" Naruto drank the broth of his fourth bowl of ramen.

"Jiji-san?" Tenten was confused, "Naruto I thought you were an orphan like me!"

"Mmhm," he mumbled through the start of his fifth bowl.

"Then how can you have a 'Jiji-san'?"

Naruto halted his chopsticks halfway to his mouth, "Cuz Hokage-jiji lets me call 'im that." He didn't seem to realize that Tenten found this odd.

Shikamaru cleared his throat, "Back to our sensei, I don't know what that technique was, but it wasn't a Body Flicker. There was no swirl of leaves, or any other material. There was just a 'whoosh' and that was it." It was Shikamaru's turn to surprise his teammates, "I think we should get to this test early."

Tenten and Naruto nearly fell out of their seats in shock. "You want to get somewhere _early!?_" Tenten sputtered.

Shikamaru nodded, "Yeah, troublesome as it is, I think letting our new sensei prepare too much could be worse." He turned a lopsided smirk to Naruto, "Besides, don't you want time to set up those pranks of yours?"

"Hell yeah!" Naruto pumped his fist, "That cat won't know what hit 'im!"

The three teammates talked a bit more about their sensei's test, and what to expect. After a while, they decided that there wasn't much more to be said on the topic, so they moved on to each talking a bit about themselves. When the sun started to set, the three agreed that it was time to each go their separate ways. They did promise, however, to each other to meet at Training Ground 3 at least 2 hours early.

(Training Ground 3, 7:55 AM)

Sometimes you just see a situation that makes you angrier than it should. Tenten could certainly relate to that statement when she saw both of her teammates already at the training field and poring over a hand drawn map. "HOW!?" she dropped a large cloth bag she had been carrying on her shoulder and pointed at them in an accusatory manner, "How did you two, of all people, get here before me?!" She then shouted a short string of rather scathing expletives that had both of her teammates rather taken aback.

Shikamaru waited patiently for her to finish her rant before asking, "Better?"

Tenten took a few deep breaths, "Okay, yeah. Better. So, care to explain how you two are here so early? You guys are like the laziest people I know!"

Shikamaru ignored Naruto's indignant squawk, "Well I knew I should be here early, so I just had my mom wake me up at 6. Then I figured that the clouds would look nice from here. So I came here."

Tenten looked confused, "Why 6 though? That seems a bit over the top."

Naruto rocked back and forward while holding his feet together in a point. He giggled a bit and said, "Shika takes forever to wake up! Haven't you ever seen Iruka-sensei try?" The orange clad Genin started rocking a bit more, until he lost his balance and fell to the side.

Shikamaru scratched the back of his head, "Yeah, it takes me at least an hour to be totally awake. I suppose you should probably know that if we're gonna be teammates." He turned back to the map, but continued talking, "I actually get up pretty early most days. If I didn't, I'd be late for everything."

"Well that makes sense I suppose," Tenten sat down next to the map, "But what about him?" She pointed at Naruto who was now also looking at the map, but twitching periodically.

Shikamaru gave her a flat look, "Him? Tell me Tenten, have you ever seen Naruto sit completely still for more than five minutes?" Shikamaru didn't wait for a response, "No, you haven't. I don't think anyone has. With as much energy as he has, did you really think he would sleep in?"

The more Tenten thought about it, the more it made sense. Naruto was easily distracted, sure, but he was definitely not lazy. "Okay then," she accepted Shikamaru's explanation, "Since we're all here, what should we do?"

Shikamaru pointed at the map, "I'm trying to figure out where the best spots to set up traps are." he scratched his chin thoughtfully, "This training ground is pretty big. Since we don't know where the test is gonna be, I don't know which spots to trap. It's a shame we don't have more stuff, otherwise we could just trap the whole place."

"You know, guys," Tenten began with a mischievous glint in her eyes, "I didn't just bring this bag for show." she pulled the drawstring of the bag and let the contents spill out. Inside there were shuriken, kunai, explosive tags, wire of several gauges, smoke bombs, and other wonderful goodies.

Naruto's eyes practically sparkled as he looked over all the equipment, "There's, there's one thing missing!"

"And what would that be Naruto?" Shikamaru was legitimately curious what his teammate thought lacking about the assortment. Everything he would have thought to bring was there.

Naruto grinned and pulled a large can out form behind his back, "Paint!"

Tenten and Shikamaru both sweat dropped. "I'm not even going to ask where that came from," they both said in unison.

(Elsewhere, as the Genin prepare.)

"You know Yoruichi, I'm pretty impressed with their teamwork. Their forethought too."

"Normally Kisuke, I would call you an idiot. But they've surprised me too. I'm almost confused that nobody else requested any of them. Not that the Hokage wouldn't have given them to me, but still." The cat licked a front paw.

Kisuke glanced at the cat from the shadows of his hat, "Well it kinda makes sense when you think about it. Anyone who read the files on these kids knows that the Nara is two steps away from being moss."

The cat laughed at Kisuke's word choice, "True, most of the other Jonin wouldn't want to deal with him if they wouldn't have the honor of training the next Ino-Shika-Cho trio. What about Tenten?"

Kisuke leaned against his cane in what he thought to be a stylish manner, "Well, she's a clanless orphan with no distinguishing skills to her. Sure, she scored highly on the thrown weapons tests, but that doesn't stand out enough for her to be scouted. If you hadn't requested her, she probably would have been stuck on a team just to fit an average."

The cat nodded at Kisuke's analysis, and then spoke in a flat voice, "And I somehow doubt we need to discuss why they didn't want Naruto."

Kisuke chuckled, "No, no I think that one is pretty obvious."

The cat suddenly grinned with a predatory look that a cat's face should not have been able to make, "Well, they'll see won't they? I'll make these kids great."

**A/N: Gah! Formatting made half of this chapter italics. Fixed now.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Bleach. I do not make money for writing this.**

**A/N: So, a couple of things. First, I know I have a couple of people that know me personally reading this. I would like to ask those people not to use my real name on this site. You know who you are. No one has done it yet, but I would like to make sure that it doesn't happen. If I wanted to be called by my real name on this site, then I would have made it my username. For my followers, favoriters, and reviewers, thanks so much. I very much appreciate all the feedback I have been getting. You guys are awesome. Other than that, keep reading and I hope you continue to enjoy this story!**

(Training Ground 3, exactly 12:00 Noon.)

At exactly Noon Yoruichi and Kisuke appeared in the center of the training ground. Kisuke started humming quietly while Yoruichi addressed the suspiciously innocent looking Genin, "Well done. It's good to see you know how to work together." The cat smirked, "It's also good to see that you all kn0ow how to set effective traps." The Genin paled, "You did forget one detail: make sure your target doesn't watch you set the traps, otherwise this happens." The cat's body disappeared and reappeared in the blink of an eye. Then a cacophony of twanging wires, clanging steel, explosions, and other such noises rang out over the field as each of the painstakingly set up traps were triggered. The Genin stared at their ruined work in shock.

Kisuke ducked just in time to dodge a balloon full of paint launched form the final trap. "My my, Yoruichi, don't you think you could have left their egos a little more intact?"

Yoruichi flicked an ear in annoyance, "Well then, down to business. In front of you there is an envelope," the Genin looked at the envelope in front of them that none of them had seen placed, "Inside it are your instructions for this test. I've asked Kisuke here to help with this test."

Naruto picked up the envelope before pointing an accusatory finger at Kisuke, "Ne, Urahara-san, are you a Ninja too?"

"What me?" Kisuke waved his fan dismissively, "Why I'm just an improbably handsome shopkeeper!"

"You three should read your assignment," Yoruichi's eyes narrowed, "You have two hours to complete it and I will be trying to stop you. Good luck."

Tenten and Shikamaru shared a look, nodded at each other, then grabbed Naruto and dashed for the trees.

Once Shikamaru deemed them suitably far away, he signaled for a stop. "Alright," he looked around the wooded area, then continued speaking in a low voice, "Naruto, go ahead and open that."

Naruto opened the envelope. His eyes took on a far more serious cast than his teammates were used to seeing form him as he read the contents. "Well, we're boned." He handed the envelope to Shikamaru who drew in a sharp breath as he read the assignment.

"What? What is it?" Tenten asked.

Shikamaru wordlessly passed the envelope to her. The paper within had a crude sketch of Kisuke with an arrow pointing to his head. The actual assignment read: _'Get his hat.'_

Surprising both his teammates Naruto was the one to say, "We need a plan."

"Okay hold on," Tenten wasn't letting this go, "Since when do _you_ plan?"

Shikamaru was the one to answer, "He's not as stupid as he acts, I imagine people don't try to mess with him as much if they think he's just an idiot. Kinda the same deal with my laziness."

Naruto's eyes widened, "You knew?"

"Duh, I actually pay attention. Just because other people miss the cues doesn't mean I do." Shikamaru snorted, "Especially those fan girls."

Naruto snickered at that, "Yeah, they're so hung up on their precious _Sasuke-kun,_" Naruto's voice absolutely dripped with as much sickly sweet sarcasm as he could manage when he said the Rookie of the Year's name, "That they don't notice anything else." Naruto turned to Tenten, "Speaking of which, I forgot to ask, you said you hated fan girls. I thought you liked Sasuke-teme?"

Tenten was floored by the revelations of the past couple minutes, "So you aren't stupid?" Naruto nodded, "And you aren't lazy?"

Shikamaru held up his hands, "Well I wouldn't go that far, I'm very lazy. Just not as lazy as you think. But no dodging the question. I wanna hear the answer to this one too, didn't you like Sasuke?"

At the pressure of both of her teammates' stares she relented, "Okay! Fine! Yes, I liked Sasuke, but not enough to get into that shark tank of a fan club he has. Why did you think I spent so much time training with thrown weapons? I had nothing better to do since every other girl was chasing Sasuke in their free time! Hell, I wouldn't even want to hang out with any of them now, they literally talk about NOTHING ELSE!"

Both boys were taken aback by her sudden outburst. Naruto ventured so far as to say, "Feel better now?"

Tenten tucked a stray hair back into one of her buns, "Okay, yeah. So back to the task at hand, why is getting that shopkeeper's hat going to be so hard?"

Naruto's tone became serious again, "Trust me, you don't know Urahara-san. He isn't going to let us just take that hat. He loves that hat."

"It looks so stupid though!"

(With Kisuke and Yoruichi.)

Kisuke sneezed, "Ugh, a pretty girl must be talking about me."

Yoruichi snickered, "Yeah, and she probably said your hat looks stupid."

"Hey! It is not stupid!"

(Back with the Genin.)

Naruto shuddered, "Just, never let him hear you say that okay?"

Shikamaru changed the subject, "After what we've seen from sensei I highly doubt Urahara-san is normal, but I'm actually more worried about our sensei."

Tenten shook her head, "I'm sorry, I still can't get over this! You're worried about a CAT!"

"A cat who triggered every single trap we set up over the course of two hours before any of us had even noticed that said cat had moved." Shikamaru looked at Tenten almost as if daring her to argue with him.

"Okay, point taken, Sensei is scary." Tenten backed down.

"So, here's what I'm thinking," Shikamaru started drawing his plans in the dirt while both his teammates looked on and provided what input they could.

(With Yoruichi and Kisuke, 12:30.)

Kisuke tapped his foot, "Well they certainly like to take their time," the shopkeeper held his chin in a pose of exaggerated confusion, "Hey, Yoruichi-san, what did you tell them to do anyway?"

The cat chuckled darkly, "Oh you don't need to worry about that Kisuke. You just keep standing there and looking pretty."

Kisuke's eyes lit up with a sparkle only seen in the eyes of the truly devoted or those very god at mocking the truly devoted, "Oh Yoruichi-san! I always knew you thought I was pretty!"

The cat dodged his sluggish hug and twitched an ear to the wooded area of the training ground, "Time to focus Kisuke, they're here."

"Focus on what? I thought all I had to do was stand here?"

"What indeed?" the cat said with a sadistic glint in its eye. Despite the banter, Yoruichi's body was held tight as a coiled spring; ready to pounce in any direction. Of course, the Genin saw this, knew they'd been found out, and started their attempts to overwhelm their sensei.

A cry of, "**Multi Shadow Clone Jutsu,**" rang out from the trees preceded an orange-clad swarm of somewhere close to two-hundred Naruto's charging out at a surprised cat and shopkeeper. The cat blurred into motion and started popping the clones with well-placed claws.

"The reports didn't say he could make _that_ many," Kisuke was cut off in his musings by a hail of kunai flying at him from behind. Yoruichi was fast enough to defend the Kisuke from both the clones and most of the flying weapons, but some kunai still got through. Kisuke's eyes narrowed and his face lost its normal smile as he dodged the flying metal. As he dodged, Kisuke realized something about the trajectory of the kunai. _They're after my hat!_ He thought to himself. He dodged another incoming wave of sharp objects, shuriken this time. "I suppose you think that was very clever, don't you Yoruichi-san?" he said as one of the shuriken lodged itself in the ground next to his foot.

The cat laughed as it dashed around the battlefield intercepting threats, "I have no idea what you're talking about Kisuke!"

"You wound me Yoruichi-san!" Kisuke relaxed a bit as the attacks on his person, and more importantly his hat, ceased for the time being. He casually looked around the training ground, "What do you suppose they'll try next?"

"Take this!" Naruto yelled as he charged Kisuke with two of his clones haphazardly throwing shuriken all the way and doing what he did best: make a lot of noise and be as distracting as possible.

Kisuke trusted Yoruichi to take care of any shuriken that might actually hit him. However, that trust was not exactly a great leap of faith seeing as the majority of Naruto's projectiles went wide and only landed in the dirt near, or not so near, Kisuke's feet. Suddenly Kisuke heard the sharp whistle of kunai flight from behind him. He leaned his head to the left just enough to let the kunai go whizzing past, only to feel a sharp tug on his hat. He spun on his heel as he felt the hat pull of his head and in a smooth motion unsheathed a sword from his cane, sliced the wire Tenten had attached to the hat, sheathed the sword, and caught the hat as it fell having been literally cut from its string. "Wow you almost had me there!" Kisuke exclaimed, "Throwing the kunai to make me dodge into the senbon," he pulled out the needle that had embedded itself in his hat and made a show of inspecting it, "Not to mention being able to throw a senbon that accurately with a wire attached to it, very good indeed!" Kisuke replaced the hat on his head and looked up at Tenten, "Clever girl."

"She is isn't she?" Shikamaru's voice startled Kisuke. The lazy Genin was crouched about fifteen feet away from the shopkeeper with his hands held in the Rat seal.

"Incredible," Kisuke mused, "It's like you're so lazy that my brain wants to believe that you're an inanimate object!"

"That is kind of the idea," Shikamaru sighed, "You let me get this close though. I know you noticed me a while back. Troublesome." He glanced over at Naruto and Yoruichi. Satisfied that Naruto was keeping their sensei occupied enough for the next stage of his plan he continued speaking, "You could've stopped me from approaching at any time, just like you could have stopped me from catching you in my **Shadow Possession Jutsu**," Shikamaru allowed himself a little smirk, "So I suppose you'll let me do this too!" He pushed as much of his chakra into the binding technique as he could. He could feel that, even overloaded with chakra, the technique would not be enough to paralyze Kisuke. However, it would be enough to slow down the shopkeeper's reactions quite a bit. Knowing that he could only hold the Jutsu in its overloaded state for a couple of seconds, Shikamaru yelled to his teammate, "Naruto! Now!"

At the signal, several of the kunai and shuriken littering the ground near Kisuke exploded in puffs of smoke. The smoke dissipated to reveal several clones of Naruto latched onto Kisuke's limbs to impede his movement as one more clone was fleeing the area with the hat.

"Yoruichi-san! Urahara-san!" the escaped Naruto clone waved the hat around excitedly from what he deemed to be a safe distance, "We got it! Didja see? We win, right?"

"Well done," Yoruichi quickly dispelled Naruto's remaining clones. The speed with which the cat did so made it abundantly clear that Yoruichi had been holding back. "All of you pass. Tenten, help Shikamaru up, that bind took a lot out of him. Naruto," Yoruichi looked at the scratch covered genin, "Have your clone give Kisuke back his hat." The cat gave the Genin time to assemble themselves and sit down before speaking again, "Now then, you all pass." A quick glare stifled Naruto's whoop of joy.

Kisuke decided to nip this problem in the bud, "Naruto, the act doesn't fool us. Same to you Shikamaru. There's no point in keeping it up around us."

"Thank you Kisuke," the cat nonchalantly licked a paw, "Since I will in fact be training you, you need to understand a few things. First, had either Kisuke or I been serious during that test, you would have failed. You would not have even had a chance of succeeding. Kisuke, please demonstrate."

Kisuke released a very concentrated burst of killing intent that had all three Genin paralyzed with fear. They knew that Kisuke was not their enemy and that he wished them no harm, but their bodies would not respond to any signal the rational part of their brains sent until Kisuke released the pressure. All three Genin started gasping in relief at the lack of pressure. Never again would they take for granted the ability to breath.

"So, are any of you going to try to argue that fact?" the three shook their heads before Yoruichi continued, "Good. You need to be clear that you are not strong. Not yet. Overconfidence in the battlefield will get you killed. Understood?" the Genin nodded, their faces still ashen and wide-eyed, "Well then. Congratulations on passing my test, most new Genin would have failed," the cat looked at the sky, "Actually, it's only about one in the afternoon, I think you guys set a record with that one." Yoruichi stood up on all fours and took on a relaxed pose, "Well that's enough for today, take the rest of the day off, let this sink in. Meet me here at eight o'clock sharp tomorrow; we will go over your performance in more detail then." Finished talking, Yoruichi jumped onto Kisuke's shoulders. Both cat and shopkeeper disappeared from the training ground with a whoosh of displaced air. As they dashed away from the training ground, they heard Naruto yell, "We did it!"

"You picked a good team Yoruichi-san," Kisuke's voice was devoid of its usual mocking tone.

"That I did, Kisuke. That I did," Yoruichi purred lightly, "Now let's head to the Hokage's office. I need to report their performance." The cat smirked, "Somehow I think he will be pleased."


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Bleach.**

**A/N: I'm going to start putting author's notes at the end of the chapter instead of the beginning. The rest of this one is down there.**

(The Hokage's Office, sometime early afternoon.)

The Hokage tapped out his pipe into a bowl, "So they passed did they?"

"With flying colors Hokage-sama," Yoruichi looked very proud, "Though there is a problem."

"Hmm?" Hiruzen looked up with interest, "And what might that be?"

"My, shall we say, _unique_ situation." The cat flicked its tail in a way which betrayed its agitation, "It may come up if we leave the village. If my team and I get into a situation..."

Hiruzen lit the fresh tobacco, "Yoruichi, I have every confidence that you can handle anything they might meet as you are." Hiruzen took a long drag from the pipe, "After all, they are only Genin."

"Sir, with all due respect, this team has three high priority targets on it. Two of those are Genin, and the third you are ordering to stay a cat. You may have every confidence in me, but if a Jonin team or a Hunter team comes after us, this form won't be enough."

Hiruzen was silent for a moment. Behind Yoruichi, Kisuke gave a barely perceptible nod. THe Hokage didn't show any sign of noticing the signal, but its significance was not lost on him, "Very well," the old man sighed out a cloud of smoke and activated the privacy seals embedded in the room, "It has probably been long enough. Yoruichi Shihoin, you are hereby permitted to disclose information pertaining to your situation and identity at your discretion. This privilege is NOT extended to anyone you tell. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir."

"Then Kisuke Urahara, citizen of Konohagakure no Sato, as witness to these proceedings, do you understand?"

Kisuke nodded, "I do Hokage-sama."

"Good," Hiruzen smiled, "Now remember Yoruichi, I am trusting your judgement on this, please do not betray that."

The cat bowed its head and said, "Of course Sir," then sauntered out of the room.

Kisuke shut the door behind the cat, "Now that we've dealt with that, I have news for you."

Hiruzen set down his pipe and laced his fingers in front of his mouth, "Tell me."

"We seem to have a spy. My agents know he's been sending information out of the village, but we have not been able to apprehend him."

Hiruzen was surprised, "How has he evaded capture? I trust your operatives have been devoting ample resources to the problem."

"Well Hokage-sama, we have taken something of a wait and see approach with him. We suspect that he works for that new village that popped up, Otogakure."

"Really? Well we should limit what kind of information the spy has access to. What is his assumed identity?"

"Don't underestimate me Hokage-sama, we have already limited his access. As far as assumed identity, well that's a little more complicated. You see he appears to be a Genin by the name of Kabuto Yakushi."

"Yakushi? But he's been a Genin with us for years!" Hiruzen pulled said Genin's file from drawer in his desk, "How did we not know before this?"

Kisuke put a file of his own on the desk and darkly said, "Because Danzo was very good at hiding his tracks."

Hiruzen scanned the document Kisuke had handed him, "So he was with Root?"

"Emphasis on the word 'was'. Apparently even Danzo lost track of him," Kisuke pointed at a line of text in the file, "See there? Deceased. Looks like we're dealing with a spy good enough to give Danzo the slip."

"Or it was part of Danzo's plan all along." These reminders of Hiruzen's former friend and colleague gave him a haunted look.

"Well when dealing with Danzo that is always a possibility." Kisuke rubbed his chin, "Either way, he's here now and he's feeding information to the Sound. My recommendation is that we keep watching him and continue our counter intelligence measures."

"You think standard counter intelligence will be enough for a spy that evaded Danzo's Root?"

"Of course not. But you and I know that my methods not even remotely standard." Kisuke cracked a confident grin.

Hiruzen sighed, "Well I trust your judgement Kisuke. As you know, Sound is sending a team for the Chunin exams later this year. if you plan on taking drastic action, do it before then. I don't want our spy having any backup."

"Understood Hokage-sama," Kisuke tensed his legs in preparation for a jump out the window.

Almost as an after thought, Hiruzen brought up one last point, "Oh, and Kisuke?"

"Yes?"

"These coming Chunin exams worry me. More so knowing about this spy. I may have to return you to public duty should anything happen."

Kisuke's face hardened. "Understood Hokage-sama," he said reluctantly.

"I trust you know to keep this meeting to yourself. You may go Kisuke."

Kisuke wordlessly disappeared out the window in a flash.

(Meanwhile, In a barbecue restaurant.)

Kurenai and Asuma were catching up, discussing their teams, and generally enjoying each other's company. Naturally, as is the case with all good things, the moment couldn't last.

"AHH MY MOST YOUTHFUL COLLEAGUES!"

Kurenai and Asuma sighed as one. "Hello Gai," Kurenai spoke with forced cheer, "What brings you here?"

"I SIMPLY WISHED TO-"

Asuma winced, "Gai, please. Not so loud."

"My apologies Asuma-san! I am just so curious to see if my youthful colleagues will be training teams this year! YOSH!"

Yoruichi chose that moment to speak up from a rather comfortable perch behind Kurenai's head where the cat had gone unnoticed for some time, "Gai, please take care with your voice. And yes, they both passed their teams. As did I."

Gai took on a rather pensive look, "Is that so Yoruichi-san? I did not realize you were to join the ranks of most youthful team leaders!"

Kurenai whipped her head around to glare at the cat, "How long have you been there!?"

Yoruichi stretched dismissively, "A while. Long enough I should say." The cat turned to Gai, "So how is your team doing?"

"Most youthfully! I shall enter them into the next Chunin exam to test how brightly their flames of youth truly burn! I have no doubt they will pass with their youth blazing truly brightly!"

Asuma recovered from the sanity reducer that is Might Gai faster than the other two, "Right, well it's good to hear your team is doing well," he turned to the cat that was still behind Kurenai's head, "So cat-san, you said you passed your team?"

Yoruichi nodded, "I did."

Asuma laughed, "Even with a slacker like Shika and the dead last of the bunch? You must have pretty low standards."

"Oh I think we will see about that Asuma," Yoruichi grinned at the two new Jonin sensei, "Speaking of which, your teams are both made entire of clan heirs, aren't they?" at the nods of assent from the two Jonin the cat continued, "Well then, I think we should make a little wager. Nothing serious of course, probably just for bragging rights, or perhaps the loser buys the rest of us drinks."

"You're a cat!" Kurenai blurted out, "Since when do cats drink?"

Yoruichi flicked an ear in annoyance, "Never you mind. So here's the bet: I say my team will beat all three of yours in the next Chunin exams." The cat looked at the shocked faces of the other three, "Oh come now, Gai already said he was entering his kids. Were you two not planning to do the same? Or maybe you think that a _cat_ is a better sensei than you."

Asuma chuckled, "Well you got me," he threw up his hands in mock surrender, "I'm not gonna take that challenge lying down. You're on Yoruichi!"

Kurenai was a bit more reserved, but still didn't want to be outdone, "Well if you three are in, I guess I am too." The red-eyed woman let a bit of ferocity creep into her expression, "My team will be ready for yours."

Yoruichi, looking mighty pleased, addressed Gai, "Well then Gai, just think of it as a youthful challenge."

"YOSH! MY MOST YOUTHFUL TEAM WILL PREVAIL IN THIS TEST OF THEIR FIERY WILL!"

The rest of that night, the four Jonin enjoyed themselves chatting and drinking. Yoruichi ordered drinks just as often as the rest, but no one seemed to catch the cat actually drinking. All they saw was a full glass one second, and an empty one the next. Despite enjoying the night, Kurenai was still rather bothered by how little she knew about her feline colleague. The Genjutsu mistress brought up her misgivings with Asuma as he walked her home. He shared her sentiment and was also bothered by the enigmatic Yoruichi.

(Training Ground 3, 8:00 AM the next morning.)

"You all have had time to think about what happened during your test yesterday. So," Yoruichi eyed the Genin, "Tell me what you've learned."

Tenten spoke up first, "You let us win."

"Try again. I already told you that. I want to hear something new."

"Then," Tenten thought about her performance in the test for a moment, "Thrown weapons are not very dangerous to strong opponents."

Yoruichi smiled, "Good. I would have started teaching you that if you hadn't realized it yourself. Against higher caliber ninja, thrown weapons are not particularly threatening since we can either dodge or block them with ease. So Tenten, does that make them useless?"

"No!" Tenten shouted a bit defensively, "The plan wouldn't have worked if I didn't do my job!"

"Exactly," Yoruichi spoke to all three Genin this time, "Every attack you use, even if easily negated, must still be responded to by the enemy. Shikamaru should know this well; it is a fundamental truth of any strategy game. Anyone, even the Hokage, can be defeated by something as simple as a Kunai. So then, all your little tricks and attacks that aren't all that damaging ont heir own, how do you use them in a battle?"

Shikamaru answered this time, "You force your opponent's hand. Every move they make in response to your actions is time they could have spent advancing their own goal."

Yoruichi's tail waved slowly, "True, but there is something else here. What if your opponent wears armor? What if they are somehow immune to an ordinary Kunai?"

Naruto grinned at this. He knew where his sensei was going with this idea, and it was right up his alley, "You don't use ordinary Kunai!"

Yoruichi gave Naruto an approving look, "Explain."

Naruto started counting off on his fingers, "Bomb tags, poison, transformed clones, wire, smoke bombs, anything sticky, paint in the eyes," he started to move into the more dastardly payloads he knew of, "Pepper dust, tear gas, broken glass, mustard gas, acid," He noticed the horrified looks his teammates were giving him. He stopped counting and scratched the back of his head sheepishly, "Yeah, aren't you guys glad I only used paint?"

The other two remembered all the pranks they had been witness, and sometimes victim to over the years. They shuddered at what those traps could have been like if Naruto wished harm on anyone.

"Naruto has the right idea," Yoruichi nodded approvingly at him, "We are ninja. We fight dirty. If your weapons aren't dangerous enough you can make them more dangerous. Against a foe with tough skin, poisons make it so that a small cut is enough to kill. As for everything else Naruto mentioned, well let's just say that there are some spots that are always squishy." The cat gestured to its eyes. Then it addressed the marksman of the trio, "I will work with you on techniques to enhance your arsenal. Also, how are your hand to hand skills? They did not come up in the test."

Tenten looked a little embarrassed, "Not very good. I mostly focused on my throwing arm in the academy."

Yoruichi switched to a slightly warmer tone of speaking, "Don't worry, we have time to correct that, I'll have Kisuke show you some Kenjutsu. he may just be a shopkeeper, but he does know how to use that sword of his." Yoruichi addressed Shikamaru next, "You're up next Shikamaru. What did you learn?"

Shikamaru held his chin in a pensieve thinking pose, "The test was supposed to mimic an assassination mission, wasn't it?"

Yoruichi nodded.

"Well then, the obvious point is that the target is of just as much concern as the target's bodyguards."

Yoruichi was again pleased with the mental acuity of the Genin, "Very true. This test was modeled after any sort of mission where our target is a living person who is protected by some form of bodyguard. You three didn't fall for the typical trap of assuming that the target is harmless. Well done on that count. It seems like you all understood that during the test, but the lesson bears repeating; Your target is often just as dangerous, if not more so, than it's protection. Never let your guard down on a mission." The cat tilted its head thoughtfully, "Actually there's another lesson there that didn't come up in the test either; Your mission objective is not secure until you have been officially dismissed by your commanding officer. Understand?"

Naruto thought he understood, but asked to make sure, "So when we get the hat, keep running?"

"Pretty much. Not a big deal here, but out in the field it isn't over till it's over." Yoruichi finally decided to question Naruto, "So Naruto, what did you learn?"

Naruto sat in an exagerated thinking pose, "Well you already sad the stuff about traps, and throwing weapons, and Urahara-san being scary," he hummed in thought, "My clones." He spoke with finality.

"What about them?" Yoruichi's eyes shined knowingly.

"They aren't good enough," Naruto slumped a bit at his realization, "They're like the Kunai. They're too easy to dispel, and they can't cause much damage either. They aren't strong enough."

Yoruichi laughed, "Now that's where you're wrong. We are ninja, we don't have to fight strong. We fight smart, and we fight fast. Look at me, I'm a cat. Right now I'm not strong per se, but I _am_ fast. Speed and precision will beat out strength nine times out of ten." Yoruichi stretched and stood up, "Well I think that's enough reflection for now. Now listen closely, our schedule until further notice will be training in the mornings, a break for lunch, then missions in the afternoons, then more training in the evening. Naturally we can't keep this schedule if we get sent out of the village, but otherwise we stick to it. We will be meeting here at 8:00 every morning except Sunday, that's your day off. Questions?"

"You said how you would train Tenten, what about us?" Shikamaru looked resigned to the fact that he would have to get up so early every day. Definitely not happy about it though.

"All three of you are going to need to work on your basics. That means Taijutsu drills, chakra control exercises, survival skills, the works. As for you personally? We're going to work on some Genjutsu for you. Naruto, you're going to need remedial Taijutsu training and a LOT more chakra control. All three of you would be well served by learning seals. Hmm," Yoruichi thought for a moment, "Does that answer the question?"

Shikamaru nodded, "Pretty much. So what are we doing today?"

"Good to see you're taking this seriously Shikamaru," Yoruichi walked to a tree, "First, I'm going to teach you to climb a tree."

The Genin were far more surprised than they should have been at the sight of a cat calmly and slowly walking up the trunk of a tree.

Shikamaru responded much as one would expect, "Climbing trees? It couldn't be meditation? Or maybe even strategy? Ugh, troublesome."

(Elsewhere, with Kurenai and Team 8.)

Kurenai had a vacant look in her eyes.

Hinata was a little worried about her sensei, "Ano, Kurenai-sensei? Are you okay?"

Kurenai snapped out of her daze, "Hmm? Oh yes I'm fine. I was just thinking." _Since when does Gai know that damn cat?_

**A/N: Alright, first off, sorry for the lateness of this chapter. I was out-of-town for a while, and last night was the first chance I had to go through and proofread what I had written this whole week. So yeah. In other news, this chapter gives some background on Kisuke and what exactly his job is. I hope you guys like where I'm going with his character. Also there was a reviewer that I sadly could not PM a response to who said something like "Tenten was in the year ahead of the rookie nine." I am aware of this fact. I used Tenten to replace Sakura because I don't like writing fangirling. This is actually a major reason I have the teams set up the way they are: Ino and Sasuke are on separate teams, Naruto and Hinata are on separate teams, Sakura and Naruto are not on the same team. This way I get to avoid a dynamic that I know I am not good at writing. Rest assured I do have plans for Sakura. The question I've been seeing a lot of is "Will X end up with Y?" or "I think X/Y is a great pairing." To the first I say, I don't know. These characters have minds of their own and while I do have an outline for the story very far in advance, sometimes the characters think, do, or say something I don't expect. To the second I say, yes X/Y is a great pairing. I like all the pairing suggestions I have seen so far. However, I do have a few pairings planned and even those are not safe from the winds of change. Pretty much the only one you can be sure of is Asuma and Kurenai. That one is pretty much canon and I see no reason to mess with it. As far as Kisuke and Yoruichi? Well as far as I know, Bleach canon never really explained what their thing was. We know they are friends, and we know they are close. Other than that? Not much. I will bug the versions of them that hang out in my head for details, but no promises. As always, please review and feel free to PM me with any questions. Thanks for reading!**


	5. Chapter 5

(Training Ground 3, late morning.)

Some people have the incredible gift of perfect chakra control. These people can take to an excercise such as tree climbing like fish to water. This was, unfortunately, not the case with Team 7. After an hour of training, the trees near the clearing were dotted with large divots from Naruto's failed attempts at reigning in his chakra. Shikamaru already knew how to walk up trees, but his method was flawed and chakra intensive. Tenten was definitely making the most headway on the exercise; she was now consistently getting two-thirds of the way up her tree

Yoruichi watched the scene with barely disguised frustration. "I guess expecting you three to just 'get it' was too much." Yoruichi's body quivered as it engaged in cat stretches. "Well all right then, take a break and sit down. I'll give you some help."

The three Genin gathered in front of their sensei. "Ne, sensei, why do I keep exploding off the tree?" Naruto was starting to form an idea of why he was having so many problems with the exercise, "Am I using too much chakra?"

"Yes," Yoruichi marveled at the understatement, "Entirely too much. Probably at least ten times as much as you need." The cat turned to Shikamaru, "You're having a similar problem. You stick to the tree, but somehow you run out of chakra too fast. Since you're a clan child I highly doubt that you have low chakra capacity. Describe to me what you're doing."

Shikamaru mouthed the word 'troublesome', then explained his method, "I've been flowing my chakra into the tree. Kind of like how I control my shadow. Then I pull on the flow and it pulls me back against the tree."

The cat snorted. Nevermind that a cat shouldn't be able to make that noise. "Well that explains it," then again, a cat shouldn't be able to talk either, "This is the problem with teaching someone techniques before the basics. You're losing chakra because you're trying to stick to the entire tree, instead of just the parts under your feet. That could get bad when you move to the next level of this exercise. There should be very little flow outside your body in this exercise. Try doing what Naruto is doing, you won't have his problems with control and he has the right idea."

Shikamaru drew Naruto away from Tenten and their sensei. Seeing that the boys were doing a fine job of sharing tips Yoruichi resumed conversation with Tenten, "You're using too much chakra to push yourself off the ground. Don't rely on your momentum to take you up the tree. Walk, don't run. Other than that, you really don't have any glaring problems. Just work on your control. You have plenty of chakra to do the exercise, but if you start feeling especially low then stop climbing and start using the leaf exercise."

"Why stop? This doesn't seem all that dangerous." Tenten was more than a little annoyed that she was the only one being warned against over-exertion, but she didn't want to be too blunt about her displeasure.

"Well first off, if you run out of chakra while you're on a tree and you fall, do you really think you will be able to right yourself before you hit the ground?"

Tenten was a little embarassed that she hadn't thought of that, "No, probably not. But those two definitely couldn't! Why aren't you warning them?"

"Do you really think Shikamaru would ever come anywhere close to working too hard?"

Tenten laughed at the idea, "Okay, I get that. What about Naruto?"

Yoruichi batted a dandelion, "Honestly? I don't think he can even get low on chakra, let alone run out. At least not yet."

Tenten was a bit surprised at this, "Really? How is that even possible? Even Jonin get chakra exhaustion!"

The cat returned its attention to Tenten, "Naruto has more raw chakra than most Jonin in this village."

Tenten sputtered a bit, "You can't be serious!"

Yoruichi continued in a serious voice, "I am," everything about the cat's posture screamed 'deadpan', "Why did you think Naruto can perform the Transformation and Substitution techniques so well while still failing to create a proper Clone?"

"I thought he was just bad at Clone techniques."

"But you saw him make plenty of clones yesterday," Yoruichi pointed out.

"That was different, those were," Tenten took a moment to find the right word, "Solid."

Yoruichi nodded, "Exactly. Naruto has so much chakra that he uses a forbidden technique that makes solid copies of the user. He made at least forty clones in our test. Some of the strongest people in this village can barely manage three." Yoruichi paused for a moment to let those words sink in before continuing, "And he finds _that_ easier than making two basic clones with no substance." Yoruichi's whiskers pricked up with surprise, "Oh I feel stupid now."

Tenten was not really sure what to do with the information she had just recieved, so she ignored it for the moment, "Sensei? Why do you feel stupid?"

"Oh just an idea I had." Yoruichi looked over at Shikamaru and Naruto, "Tenten you should get back to practicing." As the girl walked to a tree, Yoruichi checked Shikamaru's progress. It certainly looked like he was doing far better, now that he had learned the correct method of tree climbing. "Naruto!" the cat called out, "Get over here!"

Naruto wiped his hands on his pants and dashed over to the cat. "What's up sensei?"

"You do realize you can use your clones to train right?"

"Huh?" Naruto scratched his head, "how does that work?"

The cat spread its claws on one paw, "How many times did I hit you with these?"

Naruto tried to remember, and soon found that the numbers his memories gave him made no sense. "I," he hesitated, "I'm not sure. I remember getting hit a lot. But that doesn't make sense, I know you only hit _me_ four or five times."

Yoruichi nodded, "No you did not. But your clones did. They transfer their memories back to the original when dispelled. You're considerably behind in your training, at least when compared to your teammates." Naruto was about to speak up in protest when Yoruichi cut him off, "Don't worry, it isn't your fault. I suspect you were taught poorly. Especially by Mizuki."

Naruto's closed his mouth and thought back on what he had learned at the academy. He had been sent out of class often enough that he had needed a good deal of extra instruction. Instuction that had been given by Mizuki. "Damn," Naruto no longer held the illusion that Mizuki was on his side, so he could easily believe the traitor to be behind the sabotage of his academy years. "So what should I do then?"

"How many clones can you make?"

Naruto thought for a moment, "Not sure, During the thing with Mizuki I made a few hundred."

Yoruichi hummed in thought, "Probably not a good idea to have that many out for training. Okay Naruto, I want you to have about 50 clones out," Yoruichi saw him starting to make the hand signs, "No not yet. Wait until I am done explaining. As I was saying, have about 50 clone practicing chakra control. That means tree walking and the leaf exercise. Those 50 don't need to be with the rest of the team. Sometime today I'll have Iruka give you some Taijutsu scrolls. Have another group of 50 clones work on the drills. At the very least your form and muscle memory will improve. Other than that, don't make clones unless I specifically allow it."

Naruto protested loudly to the last bit, "But that's not fair! Shadow clones are my best technique! Why should I only use them for training?"

"Naruto, calm yourself," Naruto's reaction had been almost exactly what Yoruichi had expected, "Most ninja become dependent on a small group of techniques. Even I am guilty of that to some degree. I don't want you to be reliant on your shadow clones to be effective. Besides, the better you are in a fight on your own, the more effective your clones are going to be. After all, they know everything you know."

This explanation was enough to placate Naruto. He created the first batch of 50 and let them scatter through the trees looking for places to practice. He watched them go, then asked Yoruichi a question that had bothered him for a while, "So, sensei, when are you going to teach us new techniques?"

"Not for a while."

"What? Why?"

Yoruichi sighed, "Unfortunately my hands are tied on this one. Most techniques above D-rank are classified. You can't legally learn them yet. At least not until you make Chunin."

The gears in Naruto's head started turning, "But the shadow clones, that's an S-rank technique isn't it?"

"It is. Your knowledge of it is blatantly illegal. There are some parties in this village that probably would have had you executed on those grounds had the Hokage not personally intervened. Do you understand a little better why I don't want you becoming reliant on it?"

Naruto scratched his chin, started to nod, then shok his head, "Kinda, yes, no. Maybe?"

"Alright let me explain," Yoruichi was finding the act of teaching more enjoyable than explected, "Not only is the Shadow Clone technique S-rank, but it is also forbidden. The fact that you know how to use it is not widespread knowledge yet. If I have any say in the matter, that piece of information will remain reasonably secret."

"I still don't get it."

Yoruichi glared daggers at the Genin, "I was getting there. Now, as I was saying, that technique is a one of the prized secrets of this village. If an enemy finds out you know it, they might specifically target you for that information. Also, think about your fellow Genin, the Uchiha."

"What about him?"

"Let's say he activates his Sharingan. Now say he sees you perform a certain technique with that Sharingan. He may well decide that it's a technique worth adding to his arsenal. He tries performing it, doesn't have enough chakra, and then dies. Even worse, he succeeds. Then he wouldn't know about the restrictions on the knowledge and could give away the technique to someone in a fit of carelessness. Now do you see?"

Naruto nodded vigorously, "Yeah. Yeah I get it. I don't like Sasuke-teme, but I don't want him to die because of me."

"He was just an example, but I'm sure you understand the point." Yoruichi sneezed, "I can't teach you too many techniques yet, the team is in a precarious enough place as it is. Besides, I keep telling you that techniques are not as important as skill. Maybe you should start listening to me. Now get Tenten over here and spar with Naruto for a bit. I will correct you as much as I can."

(Ichiraku Ramen, around Noon.)

After a long morning of training and sparring there is only one place to go. At least Naruto seemed to think so. According to him that place is Ichiraku Ramen. Of course, it is hard to argue with the prospect of good ramen for lunch. So the three Genin of Team 7 found themselves enjoying the fruits of Teuchi Ichiraku's fine tuned art.

"So Naruto," Ayame leaned on the counter, "How was your morning?"

"Uhh, good." Naruto had to speak between slurps, "We trained with sensei. We can walk on trees now!"

"Oh really? Well I guess your sensei must be pretty good then!"

"For a cat, yes." Shikamaru muttered.

Ayame heard Shikamaru's comment and verbally jumped on it, "You know, I heard you guys mention that yesterday. Is your sensei really a cat?"

"Yes," Yoruichi spoke from a stool to the right of Tenten, "I am."

Ayame yelped in surprise, "Gah! When did you get here?!"

"Just now. So, enjoying your lunch?"

Team 7 was not surprised by Yoruichi's arrival. Tenten answered the cat's question for all three of them, "Actually yeah. I'm honestly surprised I hadn't found this place before. Thanks for that Naruto."

"Mhm," Naruto mumbled out in the gap between his fourth and fifth bowls.

Teuchi found the time to leave the kitchen and greet his favorite customer, "So Naruto, had a good mor-" Teuchi rubbed his eyes, "Ayame, why haven't you shooed that cat away?"

Ayame giggled, "Dad, that's Naruto-kun's sensei!"

Teuchi stood unmoving for a few seconds, "Nope. Not dealing with this." He returned to the kitchen; a place where things made sense.

"Well that was amusing," Yoruichi produced a scroll from, somewhere, and placed it ont he table, "When you three are ready take a look at this scroll, it has the details of your first mission."

Naruto openly displayed a grin of excitement. The cat kept an evil expression from twisting its features, lest it terrify the students.

(A particularly dusty, dirty, and generally unpleasant street, 12:55 PM.)

"Now remember Naruto, no clones." Yoruichi was enjoying Team 7's frustration entirely too much, "I'll be keeping an eye on you three. Don't slack off, and do try to be done in a timely manner." The cat jumped to a rooftop, "Oh, and keep in mind, this is essential to the village," Few statements have ever been spoken with more sarcasm, "Good luck!" Yoruichi vanished from the roof.

"Hey Shika?"

"Yes Naruto?"

"Why is sweeping the road essential?"

"I don't know, Naruto. I just don't know."

Tenten prodded a little further, "So Shika, what is sweeping then?"

Shikamaru looked into the sky wistfully, "Sweeping is troublesome Tenten. Very very troublesome."

Tenten clicked her tongue, "There it is! Shall we get to work?"

(On a roof overlooking the generally unpleasant street.)

Yoruichi watched the road sweeping from above. The cat was only alone in its observations for a few minutes. "Hello Kakashi. It is rare to see you out of your mask these days."

"That it is," the silver-haired scarecrow mused, "The Hokage insisted I take some leave. It's only a few days this time, but I figured I may as well bug the new sensei. So how are the brats doing?"

"Surprisingly well, I think I might start them on training weights soon. I gave them a variation on the bell test. I didn't have to go for any hidden meaning the way you like to though. They got the message almost instantly. Heh, they were actually working together setting up traps a couple of hours before the test."

Kakashi's lone eye widened in surprise, "Really? That is odd."

"Kakashi, you do have to give me some credit. I do know how to read a dossier, and put together a team for that matter. You know that better than most."

"That I do." kakashi pulled out a distinctive orange book.

"Annndd, he's back to the porn. Enjoy your time off Kakashi, and good luck avoiding Gai this time."

Kakashi shuddered at the though of his self-proclaimed 'Eternal Rival,' but the thought soon passed as he giggled at the little orange book.

(Back on the generally unpleasant street, some time later.)

"Sooooo, Tenten." The Genin had been sweeping for about half an hour before Naruto decided the monotony was unbearable.

"Yes Naruto?"

"Calligraphy?"

"What about it?"

"Why do you like it?"

Tenten stopped sweeping for a moment a thought about it, "Actually I," she thought a bit more, "I don't really know. I guess it's just relaxing. I can lose myself in the motions and not think too much about it. Kind of like throwing knives actually."

"Huh."

"What do you mean 'Huh'?"

Naruto tried to look nonchalant, "Oh, nothing." He failed.

Tenten put her hands on her hips, "Oh no you don't! Spill it!"

"I'm sorry, I just don't get it."

"What's not to get?"

"Who the hell enjoys writing? Especially crazy writing like calligraphy that takes forever and you have to get it perfect because one brushstroke can ruin it and..."

Tenten jabbed her teammate with her broom, "Hey! I never called any of your hobbies stupid!" her face took on a bit of a pout, "I just like calligraphy, okay? Can we leave it at that?"

"Yeah yeah, fine."

The street was mostly silent for another ten minutes before Naruto broke it again, "Hey Tenten?"

"What now Naruto," she rolled her eyes.

"Will you teach me?"

"Teach you?"

"Calligraphy. I'll probably never be good at it, but who knows? Maybe I'll like it! I'm curious now."

Tenten smiled, "Sure, but only if you don't make fun of me!"

"I promise!"

(Back on the roof.)

Yoruichi nodded approvingly at the antics of the Genin. "A fine team indeed."

"Hmm?" Kakashi took notice of Yoruichi's musings despite the book his nose had buried itself in.

Yoruichi did not feel like elaborating, and so fell back on an old ninja trick: Misdirection. "Oh my, Kakashi, is that Gai I see?"

Kakashi was not willing to take the chance that Yoruichi might be joking. He promptly vanished from the roof. Unfortunately for him, his destination put him right in the path of the same man he sought to avoid.

"YOSH! MY ETERNAL RIVAL I CHALENGE YOU!"

Kakashi hung his head as he thought, _Oh not again_.


	6. Chapter 6

(Training ground 3, 8 AM, One month later.)

One month can be a long time. It's pretty easy for a month to be long when you spend almost all your mornings training to exhaustion. Longer still when your afternoons are filled with the insufferable monotony of D-rank missions. Even longer still when you had to put up with a slightly sadistic cat that you knew full well could hand you your own ass on a platter in two seconds flat. Taking all that into consideration, for the Genin of Team 7 it had been a LONG month. The good news in all this, was that then Team 7 was now a cohesive and rather skilled unit, and that the monotony was soon to be broken.

"Team 7! At attention!" Yoruichi barked at the Genin.

The team scrambled to their feet and stood straight.

"We have a mission. You three have done well enough in your training so far that I have cleared you for a C-rank."

Team seven did not break posture, but they did look ecstatic.

"As such, we will not be training this morning. Go home. Pack everything you will need outside of the village. Meet me at the gate in one hour."

The three didn't need an hour, they already had travel packs ready as per Yoruichi's instruction, but they still found worthwhile ways to use the time.

As soon as he entered his apartment Naruto stripped his outer bright orange layer and armored himself with a mesh body suit over the reinforced bandages many shinobi were fond of. He also made a point of checking his newish training weights and making sure they were secure. He put the orange abomination back on, double checked all his gear, then left to tell the few people who cared about him (IE, the Ichirakus and the Urahara shop,).

Shikamaru similarly armored himself, checked his pack and scrolls, did not check his weights, then left to watch some clouds before the meeting time.

Tenten checked her pack, decided it needed more weapons, stripped, armored herself, increased her weights, checked their security, strapped on and equipment pouch, thought for a moment, strapped on two shuriken holsters, thought a bit more, strapped a two more shuriken holsters two her wrists, covered them with a long sleeved shirt of a style she liked that was light violet in color, strapped a tanto and two scrolls to the small of her back. Her preparations finished, the aspiring weapon mistress picked up a Chokuto, and ran through several kata that Kisuke had taught her.

Though their preparations may have been different, each member of Team 7 was ready to go.

(The village gate, 9 AM.)

Naruto, Shikamaru, and Tenten talked about what the mission might entail as they waited for Yoruichi to arrive with the client. Well, more like Naruto chattered away, Tenten kept him talking with the occasional question, and Shikamaru wanted to strangle both of his teammates for making him think before noon. Naruto stopped voicing his latest idea; which involved a princess, an evil dictator, a new country, and ramen; when he saw Yoruichi leading a very disgruntled and very drunk man to the gate.

"I still can't believe I'm getting three brats and a cat. 'S ridiculous." The man took a swig from a bottle.

_Well that explains the drunkenness, _Naruto thought to himself. "Yoruichi-sensei, this is our client?" Naruto spoke in a semi polite and professional manner.

Yoruichi was pleased to see that the Genin had heeded their instruction on how to properly act in front of a client.

"Yes. Tazuna-san, this is my team. Team 7 this is Tazuna. He is a bridge builder from the Land of Waves. We will be escorting him back to his home. Any questions?"

Tenten raised her hand, "How far is the trip?"

"Roughly a week each way on foot." Yoruichi meant 'at civilian speed', "That's part of why it's a C-rank." Yoruichi started out of the gate before pausing and looking back, "Anything else? No? Well let's get going then."

(On the road, sometime around Noon.)

Tenten and Shikamaru walked to the left and right, respectively, of Tazuna. Yoruichi took point. Naruto brought up the rear, but tended to wander a bit to watch everything on the road.

Despite his freedom to wander, Naruto couldn't take it anymore, "We've been walking for HOURS!" He threw his hands up in exasperation, "I am so BORED!"

Ignoring her teammate's outbursts, Tenten spoke up from her side of their client, "So Tazuna-san, what is it you do in Wave?" Tenten didn't particularly like Tazuna so far, his muttering certainly did nothing to improve her view of him, but she was curious about his home.

His demeanor changed completely when his thoughts turned to his work, nay, his passion! "Well young lady! I," he puffed out his chest, "Am the SUPER bridge builder Tazuna! I build SUPER bridges that are SUPER awesome!"

Naruto was curious, though more out of boredom than anything, "So are you building a bridge in Wave then?"

"A SUPER bridge," Tazuna corrected.

"So you're building a super bridge in Wave?" Naruto asked again.

"WRONG!" Tazuna shouted excitedly, "I, the great Tazuna, am building a SUPER, SUPER bridge!"

Tenten missed the significance of the second 'super'. Naruto did not, for he was quite fluent in the language of hyperbole, "So, then, the super super bridge is like four times more super right?"

Tazuna looked at the young blonde with surprise, "Smart kid. You know brat? I think I might not hate you!"

Though this may seem a backhanded compliment, it was still better than what Naruto got from most people. He took the compliment with a grin.

Shikamaru did not much care what Naruto and Tenten chattered about, so long as they did their jobs. That way, he could be free to do his, and his job was to watch for anything strange or potentially dangerous. It just so happened that he saw such a thing. Two things actually. Specifically two puddles on the sides of a quite dry road where it had not rained for days. Upon seeing the puddles, Shikamaru used an agreed upon Team 7 signal to say 'Something isn't right here. Be on high alert.' The key phrase was: "You know, I really wish the sky were perfectly clear. I could walk in the sun all day." That signal was chosen because anyone who knew Shikamaru moderately well also knew that he would never say such a thing.

On hearing the signal, the two other Genin put themselves on high alert and started scanning the trees for threats.

To make it clearer for his teamamtes, Shikamaru continued speaking out of character, "It is better to not have clouds, since rain on the road could just ruin this journey. Am I right?"

At their teammates prompting, the loudmouths of the team noticed the puddles, though they pretended to keep searching. The had not stopped walking, but they did slow down slightly to keep themselves between Tazuna and the puddles.

Suddenly, in a burst of movement, two ninja wearing oddly shaped Kirigakure hitai-ite leaped from the puddles and brandished their gauntleted arms.

A whistling noise brought the chain connecting the gauntlets into Tenten's sphere of awareness. Instead of ducking the chain as the mist ninja expected she would, she quickly drew her tanto and jabbed it upwards in a deflecting motion that sent the chain sailing over Tazuna's head. Unfortunately, the chain took the tanto with it.

The two Mist ninja laughed at this turn of events, "Hah! We are the demon brothers Gouzu and Meizu. Do you really think you can stop us from killing that geezer?"

"Yes," came the reply from where the chain had fallen. Shikamaru was crouched next to the chain with his hands held firmly in the rat seal. "Shadow Possession successful. Naruto, Tenten, knock them out." Naruto and Tenten Happliy obliged.

Tazuna stood a shocked silence. He had not expected trouble so soon. He had also not expected the team of brats to be able to protect him. However, he probably should have expected an accusatory glare from Yoruichi.

"Tazuna-san, would you care to explain why two enemy shinobi want you dead?" Yoruichi's words were polite, yet cold.

Tazuna was too shaken by the attack to try his hand at fooling a Jonin, "They want to stop me from building my bridge."

"Yes Tazuna-san, that much is obvious. Why do they want to destroy the bridge?" The cat brandished its claws, "I should remind you that since you lied to us about the danger of this mission, your life is now an acceptable loss."

Tazuna started tearing up in his panic, "It's becaauce of Gato!"

"The shipping tycoon?" Ten-ten asked.

"Yeah he's the one," Tazuna nodded emphatically.

"Why would he have anything to do with your bridge?"

"Because he already owns all the other trade routes in and out of wave. He doesn't like that we're trying to break his stranglehold." Tazuna sat down rather heavily in on the side of the road. "And now you're going to abandon us, since we barely even have the money to pay for a C-rank," he spat, "Then you may as well kill me now. Gato's mercenaries will finish the job soon enough."

"Relax Tazuna-san." Yoruichi produced a scroll, a brush, and ink in a puff of smoke, "We will continue to protect you, if you sign this."

Tazuna picked up the document. As he read it his eyes widened. "But if I sign this it means..."

"Indeed," Yoruichi cut him off, "Harsh they may be, those are the terms. I would remind you that we are fully within our rights to kill you for lying to us and not let the bridge be finished."

Naruto didn't know what the scroll said, but his stomach turned at the sight of his teacher extorting their client. Despite his inner distaste, Naruto managed to keep a neutral expression on his face.

Tazuna sighed, "I suppose I don't have a choice then."

Yoruichi chuckled, "Not much of one, no."

Tazuna signed again, this time in resignation, then he signed the scroll and put it ont he ground in front of Yoruichi, where it disappeared in another puff of smoke.

"Perfect," Yoruichi glanced at the still unconscious Demon Brothers, "Now we need to figure out what to do with these two."

(On the road, sometime after the Demon Brothers' attack.)

Having cleanly dealt with the comatose Demon Brothers, Team 7 and Tazuna were free to continue their journey. They did so a bit more quietly than before.

"So what did you make Tazuna sign Yoruichi-sensei?" Tenten asked.

"Not now Tenten. I'll explain later," Yoruichi noticed Naruto about to speak, "And don't ask how I dealt with the Demon Brothers. You don't want to know."

Naruto shuddered ever so slightly at that.

Curiously, Yoruichi froze stock still. The others tensed and scanned the surroundings some potential threat. Then Yoruichi pounced into the bushes to the side of the road and came back with a rabbit. The others relaxed.

"Yoruichi-sensei," Tenten still had her hand on a weapon, "What is that?"

"It's a rabbit."

"I noticed, I mean why is it in your mouth."

"Because I'm a cat." Before Tenten could express her annoyance Yoruichi quickly added, "It's also someone's pet. See the white fur? Usually rabbits have a white coat only in the winter. Also it is far to slow and fat to have survived in the wild."

Shikamaru somehow managed to make a simple yawn sound like the word 'troublesome,' "Why does this matter? Why do we care?"

"Apathy at its finest," Yoruichi mused, "Shikamaru, it matters because..." Yoruichi's eyes widened, "DOWN!"

Shikamaru dropped like a brick while his teammates tackled Tazuna to the ground just in time to dodge the gigantic seversword as it flew through the air and stuck into a nearby tree with a loud thunk.

A masked man wearing a Hidden Mist headband appeared on top of the blade. "Well well, what have we here?"

Yoruichi's eyes narrowed, "Zabuza Momochi."

**A/N: Sorry this is so late guys, calculus was kicking my ass. I juggled my schedule a bit to fix it and now you get a chapter. I would like to let all of you know that I am very lazy, and that while I do put myself on a schedule I do still procrastinate my own deadlines. I am sorry for that. Rest assured that I will not abandon this story if I have anything to say about it. Also, check my profile for status updates if a chapter is especially late. I'll try to let you know what's going on, but I am still terribly lazy. Anywho, were any of you wondering what Sasuke has been up to?**

**Omake:**

The public opinion of Kurenai Yuhi, at least within Konoha, was rather polarized. Many believed that she was kind, friendly, and a generally upstanding member of the community. The others were the ones that had given her some cause for anger. They believed her to be a terrifying she-devil that fully deserved the Jonin rank. Naturally, the truth about Kurenai lies somewhere in between two extremes. One does not become a Genjutsu mistress without some touch of sadism in their heart. As such, the terror caused by Kurenai's wrath was not only justified, but also wise. This was a fact that one Sasuke Uchiha was learning quite painfully.

"Sasuke, I thought you were going to beat me with that Taijutsu of yours," Kurenai turned a page in her book, "Well? Aren't you going to attack again?"

"Dammit, when my Sharingan awakens these illusions will be USELESS!" He charged at his sensei while Hinata watched quietly and Chouji munched.

Kurenai dodged the attack quite easily, "I wouldn't bet on that Sasuke. Besides, until that happens, you're vulnerable. _Hell Viewing_."

Sasuke collapsed in mid-step as he sunk into the depths of another illusion.


End file.
